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Little Films | Blackout | Thin Thread | Sparkler | Mirabilandia
1. crooked2. january 3. marathon 4. the piazza song 5. science of memory and forgetting 6. you still wait for me (live at coffee station 3.2.02) the story behind mirabilandia: this cd was recorded in march of 2002. i wrote most of these songs while living in italy during 2001--in fact, the only song that was written here, january, is a chronicle of the way i dealt with coming home. these songs are the story behind that last year of my life--the way that leaving behind everything you know can break your heart, and heal your heart, in lovely and unexpected ways. - vanessa crooked if i told you you take away my strength
would you think that i was weak
would you want somebody
who could hold you up
and if i could wring something new
out of the same three chords
would it prove to you how hard i try
to keep you from getting bored
i just want to be your anything
is that too much to ask
i'm here to be your canvas
i am here to play this straight
i'm here to be anything
you would like to paint
i'm here to be a curved or crooked line
here to be here for you anytime
and i'll be your gray or blue
cause those are what i do
the best
and everyone took all the words
sounds like a poor excuse
for having no way to say how i feel
and besides it's not the truth
cause that everyone is you
and so it's your own damn fault
if i have everything to tell you
but find my mouth glued shut
the fear of one misstep
holding back my tongue
cause i'm here to be your canvas
i am here to play this straight
i'm here to be anything
you would like to paint
i'm here to be a curved or crooked line
here to be here for you anytime
and i'll be your gray or blue
cause those are what i do
the best
january these words come out dry and clipped
i'm in a state of slipping
into the bath water
one toe at a time
and it's hard enough to write these words
and harder still to force these rhymes
but these hands this place
this coffee this table this face
these aren't mine
and things are strange
but what is stranger yet is that of course they're not
the stranger things are the things you don't read about
the blank spaces in the dark
and i find myself making plans for places
i never thought i'd go
places i never thought I'd be
and certainly
not alone
i want to handpick and name
each of these fears
but they loom up large before me
like the sum of all my years
of doing nothing
should any of this seem routine or commonplace
should being able to touch the face
of someone i love now only dimly remembered
should lines be sharper and images more clear
could i have forgotten so much
in only half a year
i want to handpick and name
each of these fears
but they loom up large before me
like the sum of all my years
and i want to handpick and name
each of these fears
but they loom up large before me
like worthless souvenirs
so i'm gonna handpick and name
each of these fears
and then i'll give them away
marathon and so i'm running scared
does that make me bad or normal
cause i think that anyone
would run from you
and so if you'd turned out to be
a gemini or aquarius
instead of capricorn or taurus
would that have been a good enough excuse
to run and hide
but of course you didn't
and now i've got more to worry about
than charting the course of our stars
and matching up our zodiac signs
so for now i've got to run
i know no other way
i've talked it over with myself
and though i'd like to stay
i find myself a bit unsure
of where to go from here
so if you need me i'll be somewhere down the road
running until this is clear
and no it's nothing that you've done
i'm not even mad
it's just one of my little quirks
a funny feeling that i had
that if i didn't leave right then
i might never leave again
well how did i find myself on this bench
in the middle of a storm
talking voices to myself
trying to keep warm
watching the foreign cars drive by
race to their destinations
there's a pair of eyes that always pulls me home
without any explanation
but for now i've got to run
cause i know no other way
i've talked it over with myself
and though i'd like to stay
i find myself a bit unsure
of where to go from here
so if you need me i'll be somewhere down the road
running until this is clear
the piazza song i haven't been here in so long
i forgot what that look
on your face could mean
i guess that half sweet smile
and slightly crazy look
in your eyes could mean
you're glad to see me
and i've been living this foreign life
and i've been wondering
if what i'm doing here is right
and i always thought that i would know
when it was time to go
but now i'm not so sure
but how i'd love to have you here
during this, my favorite time of year
we could watch the leaves change
and the snow fall down in the valley
after november rains
we could sit in my fair piazza
drink cappuccino
and talk about the mafia
even though
they're just a joke round here
they haven't been in these parts for years
at least that's what they tell
the american girls
and we could go for a walk
down a shady little vicolo
and find two cobblestones
that look almost alike
find a sharp stick
and carve with all our might
and try to leave our mark
and maybe it'll still be clear
when we come to visit our piazza
in a couple of years
see, i already think of it as his and hers
even though you haven't ever seen it
but i know you'll like it
when you come to visit
and i can't wait to have you here
during this, my favorite time of year
we could watch the leaves change
and the snow fall down in the valley
after november rains
and i can't even picture a december day
it's just a little bit beyond the fray
of my imagination right now
but that spark is in the air
and it can only mean one thing
i've run into that brick wall
of someone on my mind
and i think it'll be a long fall
this time
but how i'd love to have you here
during this, my favorite time of year
we could watch the leaves change
and the snow fall down in the valley
after november rains
science of memory and forgetting well it's a game i play with myself
it's a twisted state of loyalty
a toss up at best 'cause whoever gets the prize
is whoever was the last to leave
and importance or duration of feeling
is hardly taken into account
'cause it's the freshest imprint, however shallow,
that always calls me out
'cause there is a science to memory and forgetting
and both are cut from the same cloth
both consist of remembering pieces of the past
in a way that it was not
and if he knew i'd kissed another and another
well i wonder what he'd say
that they come up in the freeze frame but so does he
well it's more than i can explain
'cause i recall all the others i've known
all those Decembers to Mays
but he's a three year block of my past life
i only see on holidays
'cause there is a science to memory and forgetting
and both are cut from the same cloth
both consist of remembering pieces of the past
in a way that it was not
a hypothesis must be formed
a check and balance system to weigh
the damage done in keeping it
or giving it
away
'cause there is a science to memory and forgetting
and both are cut from the same cloth
both consist of remembering pieces of the past
in a way that it was not
in a way that it was not
in a way that it was not
you still wait for me i can smell fall like the savior
coming in sharp through the air
and somehow your scent
got tangled up in there
and the green of your eyes
is found in every turning leaf
and with every one that falls i pick it up
try to save another piece
this business of keeping you
in my pockets
of keeping you from slipping
farther away
well now we have different seasons
'cause there's the chill of an early fall here
these days
but we already had different skies
and different stars
at different times
so i suppose we can learn to weather
this system as well
so tell me what the weather's like there
tell me anything at all
like what you thought about this morning
while you sat and watched the rain fall
and what you thought about
while you were counting the days by the hour
and tell me the novelty's still in our novel
and this hasn't yet gone sour
and tell me
you still wait for me
to come home
and lights are going down
all around me tonight in Ravenna
as i sit this one out
and i watch the racing around
of the rails under wooden cars
and your face is the backdrop
of every falling star
and with every one that falls i make a wish
to end up where you are
and an early night is passing quickly into
a quickly fading dawn
and soon the sun will rise
and try to burn clean my memory
but i will hold on
if you'll tell me you still wait to kiss my lips
and touch my face
to feel the pulse of a thousand misspent days
racing beneath the hand that holds my cheek
and tell me you still want me for your own
and that you bless me at random
in case i sneeze while i'm away from home
you told me that you'd never lie
and i believe you
so tell me you still wait for me
and tell me you still pray for me
and tell me you still wait for me
to come home
credits: all songs written by vanessa all songs copyright little sandwich music, 2002 acoustic guitar and vocals: vanessa peters additional guitar and synthesizer on 'crooked' and 'january': lindsay graham cd recorded, mixed, and mastered by l.o.e. laboratories cd produced by l.o.e. laboratories and vanessa peters We are currently searching the vast VP archives to find something from the early early days...check back in a few more weeks!
Mirabilandia is out of print.
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© 2006 Vanessa Peters / Little Sandwich Music. All rights reserved. |
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